Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You

Debunking Forbes’ Claims: Do Elite Summer Programs Really Give Your Child an Edge?

We recently read a Forbes article about why your kid needs to attend a competitive summer program, and we have some thoughts. Join us as we get the facts straight about the article in question and break down what you need to be aware of when it comes to these expensive summer programs that claim to give your child an edge when applying for elite colleges. Find out how many of these programs misrepresent themselves (like by suggesting they are more selective than they are), the handful of programs that are credible, and how to tell the difference. We also discuss how these articles are specifically targeted at parents and teens, why their contribution to the media ecosystem is so harmful, and how to recognize when you are being marketed to. Tune in to get the full scoop on what to be aware of when it comes to these summer programs and their bold claims!
Key Points From This Episode:
[0:00:42] The Forbes article we are discussing and why we are annoyed by it.
[0:02:30] Article points we agreed with and the benefits of a program like this.
[0:02:56] Why a summer program won’t necessarily help you stand out at elite colleges.
[0:03:53] A breakdown of how many of these programs misrepresent themselves.
[0:05:43] Clarifying which summer school programs are as selective as they claim.
[0:08:36] How parents can navigate misinformation, especially regarding these programs.
[0:10:37] A reminder that you cannot control the outcomes of highly selective colleges.
[0:11:57] Critiques on how dishonest and exploitative these types of articles can be.
[0:14:37] What truly matters for your child’s long-term development.
[0:16:50] How you can get in touch with questions and suggestions about today’s topic.
Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode:
'Why Your High Schooler Should Attend A Competitive Academic Summer Program—And Which Ones You Can Still Apply To'COSMOS Pre-College ProgramSh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell YouSh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You on Instagram

How to Handle Teen Discipline Issues: Supporting Your Child Through School Challenges

Sometimes, disciplinary issues are signs of deeper pain or turmoil in our children, making it important to step back and see things from a new perspective. In this episode of Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You, Cathy and Meredith dive into the various complexities of school disciplinary issues. They break down how different schools might handle these situations, share real examples of what you as a parent can expect, and offer practical advice on how parents can best support their kids through the process. From the importance of reading the school’s handbook to knowing what to do (and what not to do), they cover it all. They discuss the importance of proportional responses to disciplinary issues and share why it’s crucial children learn from their mistakes and walk out their consequences with appropriately supportive parents. It’s about guiding them through the process while encouraging them to own their mistakes, not covering them up or making the problem disappear. Don’t miss another insightful conversation with Cathy and Meredith, be sure to tune in now!
Key Points From This Episode:
[0:01:20] We introduce today’s topic of discussion: disciplinary issues in school.
[0:03:00] You get a phone call, your kid has been busted: what next?
[0:03:20] We look at an example of academic dishonesty.
[0:04:10] Parents! Read your school’s handbook!
[0:04:50] What parents should and should not do.
[0:06:38] The best thing parents can do to help their kids through a disciplinary proceeding.
[0:07:45] What the disciplinary process (actually) looks like.
[0:11:00] The different types of disciplinary issues.
[0:17:20] Issues that are not as uncommon as you might think.
[0:20:00] The appropriate consequence and how that point is reached.
[0:22:24] Disciplinary issues and mental health.
[0:23:00] Our advice on how you, as a parent, can support your child.
[0:25:04] The importance of proportional responses to disciplinary issues.
[0:30:40] Why kids need to learn from their mistakes and work through their consequences (with the support of their parents!)
[0:33:00] Disciplinary issues as a signal to deeper pain.
Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode:
Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You
Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You on Instagram

My Kid is Mediocre, Now What?

Our world is increasingly obsessed with excellence and exceptionalism. As a result, more and more parents are fixating on how to make sure their kid is everything but mediocre. But is mediocrity really something parents should be panicking over? And could their efforts actually be doing more harm than good? Today, we deconstruct all the fears parents have around mediocrity and examine how hard you should be pushing your kids when, statistically, most of us are pretty average. We dig into the harms of pushing for exceptionalism, why too much pressure and overparenting will likely reduce your teen’s ability to be exceptional, and how to accept – and celebrate! – that your child might be average. Our conversation also unpacks the skills that will help your kids thrive in the long run, how to cultivate them, and why trying different things (that they might be bad at) is critical for their development. Tune in now for a refreshing perspective on parenting that might just change how you see success!
Key Points From This Episode:
[0:01:21] Why being mediocre isn’t as bad as it’s made out to be.
[0:04:31] Which parenting circles tend to fixate on exceptionalism.
[0:05:17] How obsessing over exceptionalism is harming kids.
[0:07:20] The downsides of overparenting: what the research shows us.
[0:09:15] Why we need to recognize that most teens are simply normal teenagers.
[0:11:16] Cultivating skills and characteristics that lead to long-term success.
[0:16:51] The difficulty of going against a culture of exceptionalism.
[0:19:45] How to embrace, support, and accept your kids for who they are.
[0:22:17] Why you should encourage your kid to find joy and try things they are bad at.
[0:27:26] How to approach challenges as a positive model for your kids.
[0:28:27] Meredith and Cathy set each other challenges to get out of their comfort zones.
Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode:
Madeline Levine Books
The Rest is History Podcast
Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You
Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You on Instagram

Should Your Teen Focus on One Passion or Explore Multiple Interests? College Admissions Myths Debunked

Many parents wonder if allowing their teens to explore multiple interests in high school might hurt their chances of getting into a top-tier college. In this episode of Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You, Cathy and Meredith tackle a listener question about whether their ninth grader should focus on one passion early or continue exploring a diverse range of interests. They break down the myth of the "perfect admissions hook," the harsh reality of ultra-competitive college acceptance rates, and how admissions officers actually evaluate students. They also discuss the risks of forcing specialization too soon, the importance of encouraging genuine intellectual curiosity, and why a well-rounded, thriving teen is more important than a hyper-focused résumé. To hear why pushing too hard can backfire and how to support your teen in a way that truly benefits their growth and future, tune in today!
Key Points From This Episode:
[0:01:05] A parent’s big question: should my teen start specializing now?
[0:02:54] Focusing on thriving, not just college admissions.
[0:04:58] Facing the facts: statistically, elite schools reject almost everyone.
[0:07:06] The sometimes boring truth about the “all-in” specialist kid.
[0:08:24] What really makes a student stand out in applications.
[0:10:48] The risks of forcing a teenager into a narrow path too soon.
[0:12:34] Reasons that some kids rebel when parents push too hard.
[0:15:16] Why college admission is not the only measure of success.
[0:16:20] The illusion of control and the impact of putting too much pressure on teens.
[0:18:59] Playing the long game by preparing your kid for life, not just a school!
[0:21:04] Real talk about how even the best kids don’t always get into top colleges.
[0:23:09] Rethinking what “success” really means and how to support your kid.
Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode:
Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You
Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You on Instagram

The Delulu is the Solulu! What to Do When Your Kid Has Wild Expectations

Delulu is the solulu! This viral social media phrase encourages people to stay optimistic and self-confident in the face of challenges and remain grounded even in wackiness. Today, we look closer at the delulu side of things and try to find solutions to the common teen misconception that fame and success are achievable with minimal effort. We discover how the pursuit of instant gratification has made teens more delusional than ever, how inexperience informs delusion, how adults contribute to and even fuel the fantasies of teens, and how nothing great is achievable without hard work and dedication. Then, our hosts share vital advice on how to coach teens toward realizing their goals before debunking the societal pathway to success. We end with the differences between a life’s passion and moments of periodic interest, and we learn how to cultivate commitment and resilience in our teens.  
Key Points From This Episode:
[0:01:40] Delulu is the solulu: Finding ways to be grounded in wackiness.  
[0:05:10] Why teens are more deluded than ever, starting with instant gratification. 
[0:06:48] The way life experience informs delusion and the allure of big tech.  
[0:09:07] How parents, teachers, and other caregivers contribute to teenage delusions. 
[0:11:16] The way teens underestimate the hard work necessary for success.
[0:14:18] Best practices for teaching your kids how to achieve their goals.
[0:15:48] Debunking the societal (educational pathway) fallacy of success. 
[0:17:11] How to help teens distinguish between a life passion and a seasonal interest. 
[0:18:46] Cultivating commitment and resilience.
[0:21:44] Our final thoughts on the role of caregivers in eliminating teen delulu. 
Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode:
Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You
Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You on Instagram

Crafting a College Narrative: Tips for Helping Your Teen Stand Out

Welcome to another episode of Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You! Today, we’re breaking down the college narrative. What it is, why it matters, and how to help your teen craft one that stands out. We’ll dive into how a college narrative differs from their school achievements, why it’s crucial to back up their story with real experiences, and how to make sure colleges see them for who they truly are. Plus, we’re sharing plenty of tips to make the process less stressful (for both you and your teen). We unpack the importance of authentically representing themselves to an admissions committee before discussing how to assist kids who are coasting along with no real specific interests or sense of self. Finally, we remind listeners that college admissions aren’t looking for impressive stories but rather, are looking for meaningful experiences in college narratives. Thanks for listening! 
Key Points From This Episode:
[0:01:48] Today we are talking about building a college narrative.
[0:02:35] How to define what a college narrative is.
[0:05:27] The difference between what they do and who they are.
[0:10:05] How you can provide evidence of your kids’ college narrative in their application. 
[0:17:08] The importance of true authenticity and how that appeals to colleges.
[0:18:20] Why parents aren’t objective about their own children.
[0:20:12] How to build a narrative when the child doesn’t really know who they are. 
[0:26:30] Why you shouldn’t try to be impressive in your narrative, but rather, authentic. 
Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode:
Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You
Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You on Instagram

AI in College Admissions: How UNC’s New Screening Protocol is Shaping the Future of Enrollment

AI is embedding itself in all aspects of our lives, and the college admissions process hasn’t been spared! The University of North Carolina (UNC) now uses AI to evaluate the grammar and writing style of essays, which are then used to judge admission to the university, and this move by UNC is a clear indication of why everyone involved in post-secondary education needs to understand AI in college admissions. We discuss UNC’s AI screening protocol, what it looks like from a student’s perspective, how AI compares to tutors, parents, and school guidance counselors, and how to use AI responsibly. Then, explore why AI writing lacks human finesse, what holistic admission looks like in the age of AI, how high school processes may be affected, and how AI could forever alter the college admissions landscape. We end with the enrolment management consequences of AI, how we use AI for this podcast, and what we think the future may hold for colleges that embrace AI. 
Key Points From This Episode:
[0:00:00] Why AI in college admissions is a topic everyone should be discussing right now.
[0:02:00] How UNC uses AI to review college essays and screen applications. 
[0:03:58] Understanding AI from a student’s perspective. 
[0:05:56] Whether it’s better to use humans (parents, tutors, etc.) instead of AI for guidance.
[0:07:37] How to use AI responsibly and why this matters. 
[0:08:35] Why AI writing will always lack human touch. 
[0:09:32] How AI could change the entire college applications landscape.
[0:12:50] Unpacking holistic admission in the age of AI.
[0:13:45] What AI in college admissions means for the high school sector. 
[0:16:19] The enrolment management consequences of AI. 
[0:18:30] How we use AI to help produce this podcast. 
[0:20:05] Our final thoughts and what we think the future may hold. 
Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode:
The University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill | AI Acceleration 
Timothy Brunold on LinkedIn
Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You
Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You on Instagram

Helping Teens Build Healthy Self-Esteem: Signs, Strategies, and Growth Mindset Tips

As coaches, we often come across self-confidence issues among teens; whether it be deep insecurity or grandiosity. So, today we wanted to discuss self-esteem, when it’s healthy and unhealthy, and signs that your teenager may be struggling with their self-esteem. Tuning in, you’ll learn about the signs of low self-esteem to look out for, when arrogance is masking itself as self-confidence, how kids with high self-esteem present, and so much more! We delve into how parents can help their kids build a good sense of self before discussing the danger of comparison. We even talk about how you can help your teenagers build a growth mindset! Finally, hear about the importance of showing your children unconditional love, even when they mess up. Thanks for listening! 
Key Points From This Episode:
[0:01:08] The topic of today’s episode: self-esteem.
[0:02:05] What healthy self-esteem looks like and signs of low self-esteem.
[0:10:03] How parents can contribute to helping their child build strong self-esteem. 
[0:16:32] The dangers of comparing your experience to your child’s. 
[0:20:54] Helping your kids develop a growth mindset.
[0:25:56] The importance of showing your kids love, even when disappointed in them.
Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode:
Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You
Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You on Instagram

College Visits 101: Essential Tips & Do's/Don'ts for Parents and Teens

Cathy and Meredith are back with another episode of Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You, and this time, they’re tackling the wild world of college visits! From planning the trip to squeezing the most out of every campus tour and, most importantly, figuring out what actually matters once you’re there, they’ve got you covered. Tune in to find out why signing up for the official college tour is a must, which parent-approved tours should really be optional add-ons, and what students should do before stepping foot on campus. They’re sharing the ultimate do’s and don’ts of college visits, why it’s crucial to "pop the hood" on every school, and how to take notes that actually help when decision time rolls around. If you’re a parent gearing up for college tour season, this is one episode you don’t want to miss. Start listening now!
Key Points From This Episode:
[0:01:00] We introduce today’s topic of conversation: how to visit colleges.
[0:02:10] Step one: make an appointment!
[0:02:45] Our street cred when it comes to college visits.
[0:04:00] Options for visiting colleges and how to sign up.
[0:05:20] The type of tour parents think is a good idea, but really should be an add-on.
[0:06:55] What to do once you arrive at the college for your tour.
[0:08:40] We share helpful tips for kids to do before they go on college tours.
[0:12:10] Looking past a bad tour guide: what to look for on your tour.
[0:14:20] Why we don’t recommend multiple college tours a day.
[0:16:00] Getting off script and peeking under the hood (of the school!)
[0:16:30] The importance of making notes and documenting your time on tour.
[0:18:40] A tip for parents: helping your kid to ask the right questions.
[0:21:00] Writing “life” observations when on tour (and what is meant by that!)
[0:22:50] Now that the tour is finished: what not to do, parents!
[0:25:30] The importance of the exploratory phase of college tours.
[0:27:45] Getting what you want without strongarming your kid.
[0:29:00] What you don’t want as a result of a college tour.
Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode:
Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You
Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You on Instagram

Secrets to Success Every Straight A Student Knows

Does it seem like your teens are just coasting through school, disengaged, bored, and overwhelmed? In this episode of Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You, Cathy and Meredith explore the challenges teens face in academics and how parents can help them thrive. From fostering engagement in boring classes to building effective study habits, you’ll learn actionable strategies for overcoming obstacles like disorganized time management, over-scheduling, and distractions. You’ll also find out why sleep, nutrition, and routine are vital for your teen’s academic success and discover the power of small goals, rewards, study groups, and time-management methods like the Pomodoro Technique. Want to empower the teen in your life to take control of their education? Don’t miss these tips and tricks to help them navigate school with confidence!
Key Points From This Episode:
[0:02:02] Top academic challenges and engagement issues.
[0:04:02] Study groups, connecting with teachers, and other tips to tackle boring classes.
[0:07:18] The need to adapt study habits to curriculum changes and seek teacher feedback.
[0:09:50] Common studying pitfalls: cramming, ineffective homework practices, and more!
[0:13:15] How distractions and poor study spaces impact focus and learning.
[0:16:47] Role of timing, sleep, nutrition, and boundaries in academic performance.
[0:22:55] Teaching teens to chunk time and balance academics with other priorities.
[0:25:39] Keys to leveraging the Pomodoro Technique and positive reinforcement.
Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode:
Learning How to Learn: How to Succeed in School Without Spending All Your Time Studying
'Learning How to Learn: Powerful mental tools to help you master tough subjects'
Pomodoro Technique
Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You
Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You on Instagram