Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You

Meaningful Summer Activities for Teens: What Actually Helps Them Grow

Not all summer activities help teens grow, even when they look impressive on paper. In this episode, Meredith and Cathy take on the summer advice that drives them crazy and often leads teens and parents in the wrong direction. They unpack why cookie-cutter internships, pay-to-play “prestige” programs, and résumé-padding service trips often miss the point, especially when they are handed to teens rather than earned. Drawing on years of admissions and coaching experience, they explain why real growth comes from embracing discomfort, taking initiative, and doing the work yourself. The conversation explores how parental over-involvement can undermine maturity, why doing nothing all summer is not the same as rest, and how teens can get unstuck when they feel paralyzed by too many options. Listen in for a grounded, honest look at what actually makes a summer meaningful for teens!
Key Points From This Episode:
[0:01:08] Today’s topic: What you shouldn’t do during your summer break.
[0:04:52] Why most internships raise red flags for us.
[0:06:15] The difference between earned opportunities and parent-arranged internships.
[0:08:38] Our strong stance against pay-to-play academic programs.
[0:09:40] Warning signs of expensive leadership programs that exploit parent anxiety.
[0:12:39] When international service trips fall flat and when they actually matter.
[0:16:57] Doing absolutely nothing all summer, and why that is also a problem.
[0:17:34] Why teens shouldn’t choose summer plans based on friends or trends.
[0:18:20] Navigating paralysis when teens have multiple interests.
[0:20:17] Letting teens do the hard work instead of clearing the path for them.
Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode:
Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You
Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You on Instagram

Holiday College Talk: What Parents and Family Should Avoid Saying to Teens

This time of year can be very stressful for seniors applying to college, and they all need a break from the college discussions and pressure that comes with it. In this episode of Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You, we are touching on what not to say during the holidays. You’ll hear all about what topics to avoid, why teenagers need a certain degree of privacy, how you can express care and interest without asking too many personal questions, and more! We talk about how to prepare your teenagers for these discussions before discussing what not to say to younger kids applying to private independent schools. Lastly, we share some examples of things you can talk about with teens other than college. Thanks for tuning in! 
Key Points From This Episode:
[0:02:20] Today’s topic: what not to say to teens during the holidays.
[0:03:20] Why you shouldn’t ask teens about college and other private topics.
[0:08:10] Cathy shares an example of an inappropriate holiday discussion.
[0:10:20] How to express interest in college applications without prying too much.
[0:11:34] What kids can say when they don’t want to answer personal questions. 
[0:13:47] How this also applies to younger kids applying to private independent schools. 
[0:15:46] What you can talk about with teens instead of talking about college applications.
Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode:
Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You
Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You on Instagram

How to Use AI in the College Admissions Process: Smart, Ethical Strategies for Students and Families

AI is changing how students navigate the college admissions process, and knowing how to use it well can save families time and stress. In this episode, Cathy and Meredith focus on the most effective and responsible ways teens can use AI for college search, planning campus visits, organizing supplements, preparing for interviews, and comparing schools. They explain why AI is a powerful tool for reflection and structure in essay writing, but not a replacement for a student’s real voice. They also address concerns about accuracy, misuse, and school policies around AI. Looking ahead, they share why AI will likely reshape admissions in the coming years and what families should keep in mind as the landscape evolves. Tune in for clear, practical insights on using AI wisely in the admissions journey!
Key Points From This Episode:
[0:01:20] Today’s topic: how AI is shaping the college admissions process.
[0:02:38] Cathy and Meredith’s mixed feelings about adopting new AI tools.
[0:04:30] How students, parents, and counselors can use AI for college search.
[0:06:06] Teaching students to research colleges using AI and multiple sources.
[0:08:41] Why AI is helpful but never exhaustive in list-building.
[0:09:54] Using AI as an essay-editing tool, not a writer, in the admissions process.
[0:14:48] How AI can help you identify distinctive program features and compare colleges.
[0:16:52] AI as a time-saver for planning tours and organizing writing requirements.
[0:17:35] The right and wrong ways to use AI in admissions work.
[0:17:56] Looking ahead at how AI may reshape future college applications.
Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode:
Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You
Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You on Instagram

How to Parent an Anxious Teen: Practical Strategies for Teen Anxiety

Anxiety is a common experience among teenagers, and today on Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You, we are sharing some tips for parenting teens with anxiety! Tuning in, you’ll hear all about how anxiety manifests differently in different people, what it looks like in teens on a basic level, how to know when it’s affecting how they function, and the importance of helping teens get out of their heads to combat anxiety. We delve into why feelings need to be named, acknowledged, and felt before discussing why anxiety is contagious, how to model behavior for your teens, and how to make sure co-regulation is effective. We even talk about the difference between sphere of influence and sphere of control and why you should validate your kids’ emotions first. Finally, we touch on the value of exercise for teenagers and how to keep an eye on your kids’ anxiety to avoid bigger, clinical issues. Thanks for listening in!
Key Points From This Episode:
[0:03:16] Today’s topic of discussion: how to parent anxious kids.  
[0:04:41] How anxiety manifests differently in Meredith and Cathy.
[0:06:42] What anxiety looks like in teens and how to know if it’s affecting them.
[0:10:45] How to help teenagers bring themselves back to the present moment.
[0:18:12] The power of modeling behavior and how to properly co-regulate. 
[0:22:33] Why you should validate before you problem-solve (if at all).
[0:24:21] Explaining the difference between sphere of influence and sphere of control.
[0:25:49] The value of physical movement and exercise for teenagers.
Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode:
Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You
Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You on Instagram

How to Master the UC Application: PIQs, Impacted Majors, Activities & Common UCLA Mistakes

Today we’re unpacking the UC application, partly because the online advice is… all over the place. With the December 1st deadline coming up, we break down why the UC application is different from the Common App and what actually matters. We walk through the Personal Insight Questions, how to choose which ones to answer, how to navigate impacted majors, and how to approach the activities section thoughtfully. We also touch on why context and extenuating circumstances should be included, plus a common UCLA mistake to avoid. If you’re feeling unsure or overwhelmed as you finalize your application, you’re not alone, and this episode will help you move forward with clarity. If you have questions or concerns, let us know.  Thanks for listening.
Key Points From This Episode:
[0:02:28] How the UC application differs from the Common App.
[0:05:00] The personal insight questions included in the application process.
[0:06:30] Strategizing around impacted majors.  
[0:10:35] How to approach the UCPIQs. 
[0:13:59] Why it is important to list extenuating circumstances or context in your application.
[0:15:45] One of the common mistakes students make on their UCLA applications.
[0:17:15] A common misstep around applications during this time of year.
[0:18:55] How to approach the activities summary on the UC application.
Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode:
College Admissions Insider Interview with Gary ClarkUC admissions REACTS to TikTok application advice
Counselors and Advisers Bulletin
Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You
Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You on Instagram

What Is a School Profile? How Colleges Use It in Admissions (and Why Parents Should Care)

The school profile is an essential document that provides the context, rigor, and strategic insight needed to build a smart, effective college application list. Join Cathy and Meredith for another episode of Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You as they break down everything you need to know about the school profile — what it is, how college admissions use it, and why understanding it matters. They also share tips on reading transcripts, which GPA to focus on, and why no amount of extracurriculars can distract from a funky transcript.
Key Points From This Episode:
[0:00:50] A proviso for today’s episode.
[0:01:20] Today's topic: The School Profile (what the heck is that?)
[0:03:00] How the school profile is used by college admissions.
[0:07:10] Understanding grades within schools and the lack of ranking.
[0:08:30] Why it’s important to know ranking and distribution when making a college list.
[0:10:00] The materials schools send to colleges on behalf of students.
[0:10:48] A note on transcripts and which GPA to look at.
[0:13:00] Why students want to have information, the data set, and a strategy for finding the right matches.
[0:14:20] Final notes on the school profile, where to find it, and why you want to understand it before building a school list. 
Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode:
Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You
Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You on Instagram

You Hit Submit — Now What? What Really Happens After Sending Your College Application

You finally hit “submit” on your college application, so what do you do now? In this episode, Cathy and Meredith walk families through what happens after the big moment, from the confetti on your screen to the first response email from your selected college. They explain how admission portals work, what to do if materials look “missing,” and why it’s normal for systems to take time to update. They also debunk common myths about submission timing, server crashes, and small errors, reminding parents and students alike that perfection isn’t the goal. With empathy and humor, they encourage parents and students to stay calm, be patient, and let the process unfold. Tune in for practical, sanity-saving advice on what really happens after you hit submit!
Key Points From This Episode:
[0:00:58] Today’s topic: what to do after you hit submit.
[0:02:39] What to expect from Common App and college confirmation emails.
[0:03:52] Setting up admission portals to track your application status.
[0:04:49] Why missing materials, like transcripts or test scores, aren’t cause for panic.
[0:07:18] How colleges batch-process and match materials behind the scenes.
[0:08:30] Why parents should avoid contacting colleges directly.
[0:09:47] Making sure students pace themselves after hitting their first deadline.
[0:10:41] The truth about submission timing and last-minute applications.
[0:14:25] Debunking fears about Common App crashes on deadline day.
[0:16:09] Why fear tactics don’t help students do their best work.
[0:18:39] Reasons to consider letting your college text you.
[0:19:54] Why small typos and formatting errors won’t hurt your application.
[0:20:16] When and how to contact a college about a real error, like a wrong major.
[0:21:22] Stay calm, patient, and let the process unfold.
Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode:
Common App
Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You
Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You on Instagram

Do Those Quirky College Application Questions Really Matter? Inside the Truth About Quick Takes and Admissions Videos

How much do those quirky one-line college application questions really matter? In this episode of Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You, hosts Cathy and Meredith dive into the world of application videos to reveal what colleges are really looking for (and what not to stress about).
Together, they share the inside story behind the creation of USC’s original Quick Takes section, why it spread to other schools, and how applicants should approach it today without overthinking. They also discuss the growing trend of 90-second admissions videos and provide advice on what to wear, how to prepare, and explain why being authentic wins every time. Tune in to learn how to nail your Quick Takes, ace your videos, and show colleges who you really are without the stress. 
Key Points From This Episode:
[0:00:00] Introduction and the motivation behind today’s topic.
[0:01:52] Learn what Quick Takes are and why students find them stressful.
[0:03:37] What colleges still use Quick Takes and how the admissions landscape has shifted.
[0:06:28] Cathy gives an example of a bad admission for a quick take.
[0:07:02] Advice on how students should answer quick take questions.
[0:09:46] How to use Quick Takes strategically to complement the admission process.
[0:11:11] The rising popularity of short applicant videos and how they mirror Quick Takes.
[0:12:48] Hear tips and recommendations for recording effective application videos.
[0:13:44] Find out why over-editing, heavy scripting, or gimmicky videos do not work.
[0:16:19] Learn the difference between authentic quirkiness and trying too hard. 
[0:17:43] Cathy and Meredith’s final takeaways: have fun and remember to smile!
Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode:
Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You
Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You on Instagram

The Plight of the Standard Strong Student: Why Straight-A Students Still Get Rejected from Top Colleges

After Cathy attended the 2025 National Association for College Admission Counseling (NACAC) conference—where a session titled "The Plight of the Standard Strong Student" drew such an overwhelming crowd that police had to intervene for safety reasons—it became clear just how urgent this topic has become. The so-called "standard strong student" is academically exceptional: straight As, rigorous coursework, impressive test scores, and meaningful extracurricular involvement. Yet, despite being "perfectly qualified," many of these students are still turned away from institutions with single-digit acceptance rates. In today’s episode, Cathy and Meredith unpack what these students often lack, why identifying institutional priorities is nearly impossible, and how families can regain a sense of control in the admissions process. Tune in to hear all this and more, including why authenticity and alignment are the real keys to success in selective college admissions.
Key Points From This Episode:
[0:01:00] Meredith and Cathy welcome listeners to today’s episode.
[0:02:20] Today’s topic of conversation: the plight of the standard strong student.
[0:04:00] We define what a standard strong student is.
[0:05:00] What they lack: institutional priorities.
[0:05:30] The difference between admission and enrollment management.
[0:09:00] Why institutional priorities are impossible to see.
[0:09:45] How we can give control back to students and families.
[0:13:45] They replicate school lists as an example of how to go about finding the right school.
[0:17:30] The point: are students diving deep enough into researching colleges that align with their goals and values?
[0:21:00] Widen the lens: not having the exact same college list and the exact same majors.
[0:24:00] Encouraging critical self-reflection early.
[0:25:40] Tips for taking back control for our standard strong students.
[0:26:36] The “village” approach and the standard strong student.
[0:28:04] Making space for authenticity to grow in our children.
[0:29:30] An example of why we need to cultivate other interests.
[0:34:40] Key takeaways from today’s episode.
Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode:
What Is An Admissions Hook?
Things That Make Us Go Ew
Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You
Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You on Instagram

How to Choose the Best Awards and Activities for College Applications

Chasing medals and certificates rarely tells the real story of a student’s growth. In this episode of Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You, Cathy and Meredith break down how to approach the activities and awards sections of college applications. They explain how some achievements, like character awards, stand out more than others, and why colleges care less about collecting trophies and more about demonstrating character, commitment, and impact. From deciding which awards to include to making sure each activity passes the “so what?” test, they share insider insights from years in admissions and coaching. Tune in for a clear, no-nonsense guide that can ease the stress of application season!
Key Points From This Episode:
[0:00:44] Introducing today’s topic: Awards
[0:03:08] Choosing which awards to highlight and where to list them.
[0:05:00] Our thoughts on how to determine which awards are impressive.
[0:05:56] Why kids shouldn’t try to win awards to be impressive.
[0:07:21] The importance of showing meaningful impact.
[0:08:36] Providing thoughtful answers during interviews.
[0:11:10] Why we (and colleges) love a ‘coach’s award’ and character awards.
Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode:
Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You
Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You on Instagram